


His Secret

by AliceCarroll



Series: A Game of Secrets [1]
Category: Mystic Messenger (Video Game)
Genre: F/M, Fluff, Genderbending, Humour, Nerdiness, Secrets, game of go
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-05
Updated: 2018-03-23
Packaged: 2019-03-27 09:58:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 5,561
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13878516
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AliceCarroll/pseuds/AliceCarroll
Summary: Emily disguises as a man so that they take her seriously during her first day in the Go society. Nevertheless, she will have to take that role longer than she thought.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Here comes a new story! I'm realy excited to share it with you and know what you think ^^
> 
> First of all, even though the protagonist disguises as a man to be taken seriously playing a game with a wider male audience, I want to say that the go community is really welcoming towards women and that this is only for the plot's sake.
> 
> Also, if you have any doubts about the terminology of the game, just ask me, though you can find some of the terms I used in this chapter in the notes at the end of the chapter :)
> 
> Thank you for reading!

Finally going to university!! I couldn’t suppress the grin which reflected my high spirits as I walked with big steps to the door of the campus where I would spend, hopefully, my next four years. But then again, who could? Besides, I’ve always been pretty optimistic and liked changes and adventures, so my being excited over University was something easy to expect.

In addition, being a fresher is great. All the societies jump to your neck to ask you for your unconditional love and compromise, but there was only one I was going to marry. I had first joined the one at my school and I was determined to enter the University’s as well to improve my skills, so I just looked apologetically to the rest of the societies. I would never cheat on my nerdy hobby.

The wide, beautiful, brown board with black lines forming squares. The smooth white and black stones. The sound of them when they’re put on the board to conquer the whole universe that the squares represent. Yes, reader. I was going to go to the Go society.

There was only one problem about that activity. The lack of feminine public had ended up on dicky members (lol) mansplaining the game to me so many times I almost quitted when I was in high school. As a woman, I was often undermined and men would take the game seriously and that was shit. So there was only one thing I could do!

I ended up deciding to give up for a day the name of Emily. I tied up my hair, blinded my boobs (fortunately small enough to be easily concealable) and put on my brother’s clothing and a pair or nerdy glasses (the latter were just for fun), before entering in my man’s apparel the room of the society with my best confident and manly grin.

The members looked indifferently at me, which was already something good. I sat next to the beginners and the president talked about the society. I was almost jumping on my seat, eager to start playing the older members and be ranked. I looked around me and found a handful of girls, at whom I looked with a troubled expression. I was sorry for leaving my comrades alone, but if everything turned out right, it would be for a greater cause. When I proved these guys here I was actually good, I would reveal my identity and then they wouldn’t undermine me or the rest of the girls.

In my head, at least, it was the perfect plan.

The games started and I did a good job winning round 1. It was against an 8 kyu player, and I was given 5 stones of handicap. Still, it was a close game, of which I was happy. The second game started and I was fighting for the dear life of my group when a blonde guy entered the room, disturbing my concentration. I lost that game.

And I was going to kill that boy.

That is, until the “senpai” that won our game told me he was going to review it with me. I nodded, my face lightning up in an instant, and focused again on the board before me.

Still, I kept my eyes on the boy who had interrupted me. His name was Yoosung Kim and apparently he had just recently joined the society and was learning how to play. He was currently 20 kyu, he learned quickly, and was playing against a girl. While the rest of the players finished their games, I stayed behind them, watching their moves in case they had any doubts or I could be of any help. I was fascinated at Yoosung’s eagerness to learn and his obvious curiosity for the game. His eyes sparkled and he furrowed cutely his eyebrows in concentration, and, the best thing ever, he took really seriously his opponent even thought she was 21 kyu and a girl. I smiled at this. Good job, Yoosung Kim.

He won the game and I offered my held reviewing it with them. He was such a cutie pie. He would get embarrassed every time the girl asked him something directly or when I brushed my hand against his when we tried to take a stone at the same time. I took a liking for him and ended up explaining some of the basic joseki and moves he didn’t know yet.

“I never asked you your name,” he suddenly said.

“Em...” I remembered my current male disposition and corrected myself before screwing things up. _Come on, Elimy, say a cool name. If you keep thinking so much he’s going to think you’re a weirdo. Any cool, badass, powerful name that..._ “Matt,” I said. “My name is Matt.”

_Seriously, dude?!?!?!?! How’s that badass!?!?!_

“Nice to meet you,” Yoosung Kim smiled broadly at me and my heart skipped a beat. That’s when I realised I had a crush on him.

That was fast. Whatever. I had to find some excuse to hang out with him, alone if possible, now that I had discovered I wanted to pursue him as a husbando and...

“I’m glad you came to help us,” he giggled shyly. “I’m pretty bad chatting with girls when I’m alone with them. I usually get pretty nervous.”

Well, fuck my life.

“Yah, lol, well, they’re human beings,” I said.

“Eh? Of course I know that!” he started blushing and I held back a nosebleed.

That’s how I became Matt during my first day of Uni. Well, at least I invited Yoosung to hand out and have something after the activities of the society. And male trousers are super comfy.

Nevertheless, how long would I be able to continue with that?


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here comes a new chapter :3 I really hope you like it!
> 
> Check more content in my Tumblr!: https://makachan88.tumblr.com/
> 
> Thank you for reading and your support <3

“You go idiot, just what do you think you’re doing?”

“Whaf arf you talkinf abouuf?”

A whole month had passed since the beginning of my activities in the go society and my cross-dressing, when my brother entered my room, pinched my cheeks and contorted them in a strange way as I tried to study (go).

“You’ve been taking my clothes, haven’t you?” he finally let go of my cheeks and I rubbed them with a slight pout.

“What’s with all that ‘go idiot stuff,’ you chess nerd?” I pointed at him and he gasped. “Besides, you still have to wear your high school uniform, so why do you care about me using your clothes?”

“Because you always stain them!”

“Well, and you always stain my sight with that sour face of yours!!”

“You damn go moron!” he took my hair and tugged from it, so I did the same with his.

At that moment, we heard some footsteps.

“What are you doing, boys?” my mother entered my room to find my brother and I sitting on two cushions on the floor and having some tea amiably.

“So, if you need some help with your exams, just tell me,” I smiled tenderly at him, and rubbed his hair.

“I don’t want to bother you,” he pouted, batting his eyelashes.

My mother smiled and closed the door, so my brother and I returned to fighting. Fortunately, he picked up some old t-shirts and a pair of jeans for me to wear.

 

“I know your secret,” Yoosung playfully said after ordering some milkshake.

I startled and blushed instantly. Well, I guessed, it was more obvious than I thought, and denying it would only make it worse, so I decided to apologise and try to justify my mischief.

“W-well, it wasn’t my intention to hide it all this time...” I bit my lower lip, embarrassed.

“Hey, you don’t need to worry,” he smiled at me. “And I’m not going to tell to the guys in the society.”

Well, actually he was the reason why...

“I understand that in high school the go societies are of a lower level,” he said.

“Whut?” I started blankly at him.

“Isn’t that the reason why you pretended to be a university student?” he asked, puzzled.

What the... oh, ooooooh. He believed I was in high school.

“I just didn’t expect you to find out the reason as well as my secret,” I shrugged. _Why can’t I stop lying?!?!?!?!?_

“Hehe, I can be smart too,” he adorably scratched his head, and I cursed my fate and wanted to hit my face against the table.

We had gone to have something to drink after the activities of the society and a friend of his was going to come and meet me. According to Yoosung, he was very clever and had learned to play go and defeat Yoosung in a day. I couldn’t believe that, so I had to see it with my own eyes.

“I had my suspicions because I never saw you at the campus,” he said. I attended classes with my female clothes. “But your face when I told you I knew your secret spoke up for you.”

“Hehe,” I chuckled uncomfortably.

His phone buzzed and he took it, apologising as he fidgeted with it, frowning.

“Some friends and I are organising this party,” he explained, “and they keep teasing me because I don’t have a girlfriend,” he sighed.

I smiled. I had the perfect solution for that. Only that I was supposed to have a penis!!! I sighed, crying internally.

“Why do they tease you about that? It’s not something bad, being single. I don’t have a boyfriend and I’m perfectly fine about that.”

I was friendzoning myself. If the boy was straight, I was friendzoning myself. If the boy was gay, I was friendzoned since the moment I was born. I could only stand a chance if he was bi!! In which case, I had to hope for him to don’t mind about liars too.

My perfect plan for flirting was terrible.

“I’ve always wanted a girlfriend,” he pouted.

“I thought you were popular?” I drank from my coffee. “The girls in the society look at you quite a lot, and you’re cute.”

“They look at you,” he sighed, blushing at my compliment.

“They don’t,” I replied, and he frowned.

“A-and you are cute too,” he said, making me blush too.

I startled and hid my face behind my hands. My perfect plan was not so terrible!

At that moment, I heard a loud ‘yooo!’ and Yoosung exclaimed.

“Seven!!”

I looked up. Yoosung’s face was still quite red, matching with the hair of the boy that had just come. He was wearing strange stripped glasses about which I instantly felt jealous, a weird hoodie and was grinning broadly.

“So, this is the friend I told you about,” Yoosung pointed at me and I raised my hand.

“Hi! Nice to meet you,” I smiled.

“Is it?” the boy asked, startled and adjusted his glasses to take a better look at me. “Your _male_ friend? Is this your _male_ friend?!”

“Don’t be rude!” Yoosung hit his shoulder as I was too focused on not dying right then.

“Well, you’re quite the feminine type too, but are you sure he’s a he?”

“I’m right there, you know?” I said with an un-amused face, something like: -.-

He put his hands on his mouth dramatically.

“Yeah, stop being rude,” Yoosung scolded him. “Now, are you going to show him your skills at go?” he asked him and I got my board ready.

“Sure,” he grinned, rustling his fingers.

He was surprisingly good. I won the first game, but all his moves made more or less sense. He was perfect at calculation, though he had more problems with influences, but he was surely going to manage in no time. I lost the second game and we agreed on playing the third game with 8 stones of handicap instead of 9.

_Just how many games can he play before getting tired?_

In the middle of the game, Yoosung went to the toilet. I nodded, trying to stay focused, and suddenly Seven spoke up.

“Ok, little girl, why are you pretending to be a man for our cutie pie?”

I looked up at him, startled.

“I’m...”

“Please, don’t deny it and I’ll show you pictures of my own cross-dressing.”

“Hi, I’m Emily.”

Seven laughed at my eagerness and took his phone, looking for the photos.

“I can multitask,” he playfully insisted.

I explained my story and he just couldn’t stop laughing the whole time.

“Looks like something I would do myself,” he said.

“Please, please, don’t tell him!” I begged. “He’s going to hate me!”

“Ok, if it’s of any consolation I don’t think he’ll hate you,” he winked. “But if you still don’t want me to tell him, you’ll need to do something for me,” he teased me.

“What?” I bit my lower lip.

“I don’t know yet, but I’ll ask you eventually,” he stroke out his tongue playfully.

I accepted with a sigh just as Yoosung came from the toilet.

I lost that game too. Just how smart could that nerd be?!

 

“I’m going to stop going to the society,” Yoosung said when we were heading back home.

“What?!” I asked him, startled. “Why?”

He let out a shy chuckle.

“I actually get tired pretty soon of societies, and I want to try a new one,” he confessed. “But I would like to hang out with you after the activities of yours if that’s alright? Oh, and I really love the interest you put in go, so if you can still teach me from time to time...”

 _He just said he loves what?!?!?!?!_ I sniffed, and held back tears, moved.

“That sounds wonderful!” I exclaimed, moved.

“Are you crying?!?!”

I embraced him.

 

The next day I went to class, walking at a fast pace as I argued with my brother on the phone, so it was just normal that I walked on someone. I tripped, but they grabbed my wrist before I could fall.

“I’m sorry!” I exclaimed, still looking at the floor.

“It was my fault too,” a voice I recognised pretty well replied.

I looked up to find Yoosung Kim smiling shyly at my female self.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Only one chapter left! (Which I'm going to upload later today e.e)
> 
> Thank you for reading!

I let out a small and surprised squeal and moved back, my face probably reflecting absolute terror.

“I’m sorry I surprised you!” Yoosung exclaimed, clearly worried. “Are you alright?”

“Yeees?” I replied, though it came more as a question. _Wait, he doesn’t recognise me?!_

“Are you sure?” he chuckled, probably thinking I was a weirdo, which was actually quite true. I nodded, fearing a verbal answer would show him what he hadn’t seen before. Suddenly, he narrowed his eyes. “Do we know each other?”

“I don´t think so,” I said, raising my eyes to look at him and lowering them immediately afterwards.

“Oh, sorry,” he blushed and moved away. Why was he so cute?! “You look familiar.”

“A lot of people tell me so, I must have a doppelganger here,” I replied and he let out a low, blissful, chuckle.

“My name is Yoosung Kim,” he said with a smile.

“I’m Emily, nice to meet you.” _Again_.

“Nice to meet you,” he tilted his head. God, was he trying to break his own record in cuteness?! I felt my face heating up and looked at my clock to try to hide my blush.

“I should be going then,” I said, cursing myself.

“See you around,” he smiled.

Oh, he had no idea.

 

I must say I was a tiny little bit disappointed about the fact that he hadn’t recognised me, though I tried to comfort myself with the thought that he just didn’t think I was silly enough to pretend I’m a man. Well, that wasn’t really comforting, but...

I, or rather Matt, was going to meet Yoosung after the activities of the club, as usual, and go to our favourite café. There, he talked to me about his new club and I listened to him, leaning my cheek on my hand and sighing from time to time, his happiness and excitement making my heart race and my cheeks flush and... Oh, my fucking God, he was going to notice.

“I miss you at the society, though,” he said, blushing, as I tried to compose myself. “It was nice to be with a guy that also looks cute and feminine, hehe.”

“Oh, God,” he called me cute!!!!! I hid my face behind my hands.

“I’m sorry!!” he exclaimed. “Did I upset you?”

“I’m sure you’re way cuter,” I said.

“M-me?!”

We ended up looking away from the other, too embarrassed to talk, and, in my case, too happy to stop grinning like an idiot.

 

“Hey,” I heard a whisper as I tried to take a book from the library.

I startled and turned to see Yoosung smiling at me.

“Yoosung?”

“Emily, right?” he smiled. “Let me help you.”

He took the book, which I was aiming for, though it cost him some time since he’s almost my height. Then, I realised. If Yoosung was straight, I should try to flirt with him in this form!!

“Thank you, darl...” I tried to lean sexily on the selves, but I leaned clumsily instead, and stuttered.

He blushed nonetheless and whispered a troubled ‘you’re welcome.’

“Are you going to study here?” he asked me.

“I was going to, but couldn’t find any empty tables, and I usually whisper as I read,” I confessed and he let out a low chuckle.

“Do you want to come with me? I don’t mind some noise,” he said.

I ended up sitting next to him and getting distracted by our closeness. I started drawing silly doodles on the corners of his notebook, at which me complained and replied with some of his own in mine. We ended up giggling in the middle of the library, messing at our seats and had to go out of there before someone had to call our attention.

I would have liked to agree to his offer to see me home, but my male persona had already invited him there. That had been a funny day.

I had been worrying about a go tournament and he had told me he didn’t mind doing me some company at home to try to calm down. I had accepted without giving it a second thought, happy at the prospect of seeing him. What I hadn’t taken into account was that my room was clearly a woman’s room. I wouldn’t have minded the stuffed toys. I wouldn’t have minded the pink, the flowers, not even my dresses and necklaces, earrings and makeup. I could have always given a speech against patriarchy and gender stereotypes, and end of the trouble, but... THE UNDERWEAR.

It’s true that my underwear was hidden in its drawer but WHO KNEW?! And I had already raised suspicions enough and I couldn’t risk Yoosung finding out that I was a girl.

Less so after he had known my female persona.

Less so when I had so many pictures of myself as a girl at my room.

There was only one thing I could do.

“Pretty please, beloved brother!!”

“I’m not going to switch rooms for you and your gay boyfriend to make out in here!!” Emil, my parents are not very imaginative, yelled at me, trying to break from my embrace.

“Pleeeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaaaassssssssssseeeeeeeeee!”

“You’re a fucking pain!”

“You’re a high school student, it’s perfect! Please! I will do the dishes for the next three weeks!!”

And so I did.

I couldn’t convince my brother of dressing as a woman, though. And it was weird having him spying on us to make sure we didn’t have gay-straight sex on his bed.

Anyway.

The point is! I had to part ways from Yoosung a bit too soon for my taste. And apparently for his too. Which was cool.

“I just feel more comfortable around you than around the rest of the girls. Maybe because you look familiar.”

If he only knew...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you'd like to support me, visit my Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/alicecarroll


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here comes the last chapter!
> 
> If you enjoyed the adventures of Emily, check the next story of this series, which will be about her brother! and become a Patron to read more about them :3
> 
> Thank you for reading and your support! <3

“I know what you can do?” he playfully said.

“Just how did you get my phone number?!”

I had received a call from Yoosung’s friend, that strange Seven person, and as you can read he had told me he had something in mind for me to repay him keeping his mouth shut.

“Professional deformation,” he enigmatically replied. “Anyway, I need you to go to the direction I’m going to send you!”

“I’m scared.”

“Don’t be! Sevenny is good, Sevenny is inoffensive.”

“How do you want me to believe that?”

I received a message with the address and put on my jeans and a shirt to go to the place. It took me longer than expected, since I got lost, but I finally arrived without much ado. I knocked on the door and replied to some strange questions it posed. I wasn’t even surprised at this point. My life had been quite weird for the last couple of months. Talking doors were to be expected.

“Welcome to God 707’s palace!”

“Just why do I have to participate of this?”

“Why are there two Sevens?” I asked, sighing.

“I’m Saeran, his twin,” the second Seven said.

“LOLOLOL! You have to participate because you actually love it. Wow, Emily, you look good in your female clothing!” Seven gave me a thumb up.

“Thanks, dude, you too.”

He was wearing a maid dress and a wig. His brother, though, was dressing as a normal person.

“I know. Well, let me explain the situation. My maid, Mary Vanderwood 3rd...”

“What kind of maid...?” I narrowed my eyes.

“Vanderwood is not your maid,” Saeran rolled his eyes.

What the actual fuck were they talking about?

“... has decided not to come for some reason...”

“You don’t even pay them,” Saeran interrupted his brother.

“So you want me to clean?” I asked him.

“Bingo!”

Doing Seven’s chores was not easy. More so, when he wouldn’t stop playing and messing around. He said he was helping me, but he was just making everything worse as his brother looked from his seat on the couch, eating popcorn. Literally.

“Let me take us a picture to immortalise the moment!” Seven exclaimed before I took off the maid dress he had made me use.

“Ok, but don’t show it to Yoosung!” I said. “He has met me as a woman and he’ll discover who I am.”

“You two are so amusing,” Seven laughed and Saeran raised an inquisitive eyebrow.

I left Seven’s home after playing some go and recommending him some web pages to play online after making him promise he was not going to hack them –he had been telling me something about his previous life while we cleaned.

 

My female self found Yoosung at the library again the next day. I smiled broadly and walked towards him as he greeted me, waving his hand and with a smile. I sat next to him, getting ready my books to study something else than go.

“How are you?” I asked him on his notebook.

“Fine, getting ready for my upcoming exam,” he replied on mine.

I chuckled.

“Good luck!”

“Thank you J”

I looked at him, my hand on my cheek and he stared at me shyly from the corner of his eye, blushing lightly.

“Want to hang out after studying?” I asked him.

“I think I’m going to meet a friend. Wait, I’ll ask him.”

Just as he sent a message, my phone buzzed on the table. Geez, I had forgotten to mute it. I took it and saw with a blush that Yoosung had texted _me_. Well, Matt me. Whatever. I replied without giving it much of a thought.

**Yoosung** **☆** **:** Are you free today?

**ME:** Nope, sorry.

**Yoosung** **☆** **:** ’Key, see you tomorrow as usual, then :D

“I’m free,” he told me and I hid my phone in a hurry.

“Nice.”

We went for a walk at a nearby park. The weather was sunny, so it was not too cold and I took off my jacket. We went to a bench and sat there, chatting amiably about classes. It was difficult to talk to him without showing I knew more about him that I was supposed to, but somehow I managed.

“Do you want to hang out this weekend?” I was finally brave enough to ask.

“Sure!” he replied. “We can play LOLOL if you want to.”

“Sounds like a plan,” I smiled.

 

The next day, I decided to pick Yoosung up, in my male attire, from the activities of his new club to surprise him. I waited at the door, jumping on my spot impatiently, and I finally heard some people going out of the room. Yoosung had told me he was going to quit that society too because he didn’t like the people there, so I wasn’t surprised when I noticed some people looked at me with an air of superiority. Stupid. They didn’t belong to _the_ go elite and believed themselves better than I. Tsk.

Finally, Yoosung went out of the room and some people chuckled when he waved at me, his face instantly brightening in a broad smile when he saw me.

“Your prince charming is picking you up?” one of them said with an air of mockery.

“He... he’s not...” Yoosung stuttered, blushing.

I couldn’t help but smiling. People shipped us!!

“Disgusting,” another said.

Hey, what? Excuse me?!?!?!

“Excuse me?!?!?!” I actually exclaimed at him and he and his friend laughed.

“Dis-gus-ting. You guys are disgusting.”

“Stop it,” Yoosung asked him, trying to sound rough, but a light pout and his trembling voice gave him out.

“Is the baby girl going to cry?” unbearable-guy 1 mocked him.

“I’m...”

“YOU ARE THE ONE WHO IS DISGUSTING, YOU LITTLE PIECE OF...” I yelled at them and was interrupted by their intimidating gaze.

“Of what?” one of them walked towards me and the other followed him.

“Of empty triangle,” I narrowed my eyes to look at him intimidating...ly?

“What?” one asked to the other.

“I don’t know, but I think he insulted us.”

“Of course I did, you stupid dango! And I’m sure you actually like Yoosung!!”

One of them pushed me and I fell backwards just as I heard Yoosung letting out a small yell of fear and worry. I took off my shoe and threw it at him –uncovering my pink socks.

“What are you doing, you faggot!?” the guy yelled at me and I threw my other shoe at him –uncovering my heart-patterned sock. Nice day to put on different socks.

“Leave him alone!” Yoosung tried to come to my rescue, but they ignored him and shoved him to the side.

I opened my bag in a rush and protected my face with a book just as he was about to punch me. It was a really tough book, ok? Just as he moved back, I kicked his leg, making him stumble, but the other one pulled at my hair. Useless move. I’m used to my brother doing that. I hit him with the same book I had used to protect myself earlier. He didn’t flinch, though.

“A professor!” Yoosung started yelling just as the other one was going to punch me, this time probably for real. “A professor is coming!”

Oh, shit, if a professor came they were going to ask me my name.

The guys let me fall on the floor and stormed away, and Yoosung rushed to my side.

“Are you ok?”

“I am,” I replied. “Where’s the professor?”

“I made that out,” he replied and I sighed in relief. “Your shoes,” he gave them to me and I put them on with a ‘thanks.’

“Thank you for defending me,” he smiled and blushed lightly. “But you shouldn’t have done that!” he furrowed his eyebrows. “They could have hurt you.”

I looked at him, surprised, and laughed.

“It’s alright, thank you for worrying,” I smiled and the red in his cheeks darkened.

“J-just don’t do that again.”

“Sure thing,” I playfully replied and kissed his cheek. Wow. Had that been too much?

I would never find out, for he was stuttering too much to be able to utter a word.

 

The weekend arrived and I put on my best dress to meet Yoosung.

“So, you’re going to meet your gay boyfriend dressed as a girl?” my brother asked me from the couch.

“He’s not gay, he wants a girlfriend,” I said.

“He’s bi, then.”

“Dunno,” I replied. “I hope so, though. Anyway, wish me luck!”

“Yah, yah, good luck!” he indifferently said, returning to his chess book.

I met Yoosung at the door of the Uni. He had arrived early, which made me smile.

“Did I make you wait too much?” I asked him and he startled in surprise.

“N-no!” he stuttered. “You didn’t. Thanks for coming, I mean... gaaah!” I chuckled at his shyness and he finally looked at me. “Shall we get going?”

“Sure!”

We went to a cafeteria and chatted before he took me to his place to teach me how to play LOLOL. I made all kind of comparisons of the game with go in my head, but couldn’t say them out loud, which was frustrating, so I distracted myself with the way Yoosung’s hand tensed round the mouse or on the keyboard when he played, which was... sexy. I wanted to find out what more he could do with those strong and precise fingers of his and...

“Watch out!”

I got killed.

He put himself behind me to help he get to my corpse and bring me back to life, and I could feel his breathing next to my neck and he was so close, and ngreikjgnvfd

“I like you,” I said.

He startled and looked at me, our faces pretty close and flushed.

“Wh...?”

“I like you,” I repeated.

He moved back and sat on his bed.

“I...I’m sorry, I...” he scratched his head awkwardly. I bit my lower lip. Oh, shit. I was going to be rejected, right? “I’m sorry, it’s not that I don’t like you, but there’s someone I’ve been crushing on for a while now and...”

“I understand,” I stood up to leave. “Good luck with her.”

He whispered a ‘thank you’ and I left his apartment holding back tears.

It was clear Emily shouldn’t get close to him again, or things could get awkward. But what was Matt going to do?

 

Matt decided to hang out with him, of course. Damn Matt!! There was no way I was going to overcome my feelings for him this way, but... Matt is stupid! Damn men!

Yoosung was quieter than usual, probably because the previous day he had rejected a girl. Ohohohoho. Nothing serious, yah, sure!! I was down too, for my damn female persona had been rejected. We looked like shit.

“Matt...” he called me and I looked at him. “A girl confessed to me the other day.”

“Hmm...” I indifferently replied, dying a little bit in the inside. “I’m sure she was cute,” I said, defending myself.

“She is,” Yoosung replied and I wanted to kick him. “But I rejected her.”

“Why?” I whined.

“Because I like you.”

_What the fuck? Hold on there for a minute._ I stopped and looked at him, surprised and confused.

“I’ve been crushing on you for some time and I... I think... I’ve got the impression that you might not feel entirely indifferent towards me?” he stuttered, blushing fiercely as I just stared at him with my face completely flushed and surprised. “It’s because you said you wanted a boyfriend and... well... I... I don’t know I...”

I started laughing.

I

Started

Freacking

Laughing.

And to be honest, I’m laughing as I write this, too. How are we so silly?

“D-don’t laugh!” he asked me, angry and embarrassed.

I shook my head and took off my rat-tail and my glasses.

“I like you too,” I said with my feminine voice.

Yoosung narrowed his eyes.

“You look familiar.”

“Yoosung, I’m Emily!” I laughed.

“What?! Wait, you like me?!?!”

I started laughing louder and he blushed, embarrassed at my laughing and his thickness.

“I’ve been liking you since I met you. As you said you didn’t feel too comfortable around girls I decided to keep on dressing as a man.”

“Why did you dress as a man in the first place?!”

“Well...”

“Wait. Then, you’re not in high school?!”

“Yoos...”

“Are you sure you like me?!”

I silenced him with a kiss.

 

Yoosung didn’t get mad at me for lying. He said he was too relieved at not having to break my heart(s?) and that he was too happy that I liked him too to get really angry. I promised him I would never lie again, though.

Seven got really happy for us and Saeran said we were stupid. He was quite right.

We continued playing go and he tried to teach me LOLOL, but I was too clumsy to play properly.

Some days I still dress as a man. The trousers are comfortable. My brother gets mad.

Oh, my brother met Yoosung, too, and he liked him a lot. I know he threatened him with his life if he hurt me, so I threw my shoe at him to make him leave my cinnamon roll alone.

It’s fun to think how we got to date after so many misunderstandings and secrrrets, but I can say I learned the lesson. I never lied again, as I swore I would after feeling Yoosung’s lip returning my kiss.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Empty triangles and dangos in go are useless formations :3
> 
> Support me on Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/alicecarroll

**Author's Note:**

> Kyu: the classification of your go level. A go player starts off being 30 kyu and as they level up, they substract numbers until they reach 1 kyu. As they continue improving, they become 1 dan. The maximum level is 9 dan.
> 
> Joseki: opening moves.
> 
>  
> 
> Check more content in my Tumblr!: https://makachan88.tumblr.com/


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